Adventures in Car Selling

We are selling our used minivan and I am still perfecting the art of telling insulting potential car buyers to politely go to H3LL.

I've had numerous callers who immediately offer less, sometimes half our asking price. How can you make an offer on a car you've never seen? Maybe the car you're thinking of doesn't have an engine?

If all you have to spend on a car is $4000, why are you looking at car that is priced 30% higher? How is, how much money you have to spend, OUR Problem? Do I go into the grocery store and tell them, "Gee, all I have is a dollar for this 3 dollar loaf of bread?" I DON'T Think So!!!

Don't call it Transmission OIL, Moron, it's called Transmission Fluid.
And yes, I have every receipt for this well maintained car because I transport the most precious cargo of all, my family and friends in it!! I know the concept of maintaining your car properly can be strange and foreign to some folks, But just like for people, same thing for cars, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, or in this case, being stranded and a Big repair bill.

Please don't tell me a car with 10,000 miles per year is "High Mileage". Do your research and go bother somebody else who needs this nonsense!

Thank you, I feel better now.

Morons Abound/Dear Loser Letters Redux

Thank you all so much for your kind comments about my dealing the opportunistic MLM blogger. You know I must feel passionate about something to write more than 100 words!! Because of both my work with pediatric oncology patients and personal experience of losing a brother at 24 years old due to cancer, this whole issue really brought out my protective Mama Bear instinct. Thank you all again for the props, mucho appreciado.

I rarely get the opportunity to let folks know (politely of course!) that they are Not Making Good Choices!! Like these few examples of Dear Loser Letters-

Dear Fellow Forty-Something Baseball Team Mom,

I understand low cut jeans and hot pink thongs are the height of fashion. Please be aware of the effect of this combination when you lean or bend forward.
I have never seen my son's eyes open quite so Wide.

Signed, Not a Fan of Butt Floss


Dear Fellow Sixty-Something Baseball Team Grandpa-

We all appreciate it's 95 degrees during the game and you are trying to cope by wearing a tank top tshirt on your grandfatherly figure. Your ample mane of thick, swirly, dark body hair on your ample girth is too insulating for the sleeveless tshirt to be helpful.
It does however remind me I need to take the kids to the zoo this summer.

Signed, Not a Fan of Wife Beater Tshirts

Dear Moron Cigarette Smoker-

I understand you are an adult and you can smoke in your car while driving. Cars nowadays come equipped with an ashtray. Southern California is in a drought with tinderbox dry conditions. Please explain why you must flick your lit cigarette out the window.

Signed, Getting your License Plate Next Time

Addendum for Momma Val- (see I take requests)

Dear Mr.Clueless,

We all know how busy and important you are. This is to inform you the door the very pregnant lady was holding open wasn't intended for you, but for her toddler. Not you. Shocking I know as there really is no one else in the Universe. Now, tell me how I can contact your mother so I can slap her for Not Teaching You Any Manners!

Signed, You Should Be Ashamed

Calling People Out All Over Town

I have been calling people out all over town this last week.

First, I sent a letter to a community magazine regarding their use of the outdated term, "Male Nurse". (Blogged about in my post, "1909 or 2009?") I got a nice reply from the author of the article and she apologized and said her intent was never to offend those in the Nursing Profession. I was happy to welcome her into the 21st century.

Yesterday, I was stopped at a red light and watched while a school maintenance truck driver ran a red light and then proceeded to tailgate and weave his way through traffic. The school district has all their trucks numbered and I called their office and notified a supervisor of my observations. I don't like getting someone in trouble or Gasp, even worse, be a tattle tale, but C'mon buddy, your Truck number is emblazoned in Big, Bold letters for all the World to see, how could I not follow up?

Have you had to call anybody out lately?

Thank you, Martha